


The Bell Jar

by ButterflyBunny



Series: Avengers' Infinite Playlist [16]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Cats, Clint Barton's Farm, F/M, Friendship/Love, Horseback Riding, Horses, Hurt Wanda Maximoff, Inhumans (Marvel), Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Minor Clint Barton/Pietro Maximoff, POV Wanda Maximoff, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Romance, Secret Identity, Secrets, Small Towns, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-16
Updated: 2016-06-16
Packaged: 2018-07-12 15:26:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7111468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ButterflyBunny/pseuds/ButterflyBunny
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He didn’t give her a phone or sent her a letter. Still, Wanda finds a way to reach for him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Bell Jar

**Author's Note:**

> The story is inspired by the Sylvia Plath quote:
> 
> "I took a deep breath and listened to the old brag of my heart: I am, I am, I am.”

_[(Say Something – A Great Big World & Christina Aguilera)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-2U0Ivkn2Ds) _

 

Wanda offers to wash the dishes when they finish dinner that night – a delicious steak with baked potatoes Clint made. She knows Clint and Pietro are eager to spend time alone, after Pietro insisted on spending more time with her since her arrival. She offers her brother a smile smile before he goes and follows Clint to the living room, where she can already hear the TV. Looking outside, finding the dark peaceful for some reason, she starts washing the plates. She wishes Clint had a washing machine like they did back at the Avengers tower, or in the facility where they had spent the last few days before… Everything happened.

Clint said he hadn’t being able to replace many things since he hadn’t been in that farm for so long. He told her when she asked if they’d be save there.

Wanda takes her time doing her task, not using her abilities, both her and Pietro promised they wouldn’t used them anymore unless it was fully necessary. Pietro still did his morning runs, though, like she levitated small objects in her room. When she wanted her ipod to listen to music, while she brushed her now a little bit shorter hair.

“Lucky” She smiles, when the old dog nudges her knee, “No, Clint said no leftovers for you”

That night when she goes to sleep she is grateful she can’t hear her brother and Clint make love, and she giggles when Pietro laughs softly after there is a loud thump in the floor, she assumes Clint fell or hit his head with something. After everything goes quiet and she can only hear the trees moving with the wind and the sound of the crickets, she calls Vision.

It had been almost two months and she promises not to do it again if he doesn’t answer.

“ _The lake is already defrosted so I wasn’t able to skate this time_ ” She rolls onto her stomach, “ _Summer is coming, but the water is still cold, Clint says it stays fresh during most of the year_ ”

She waits one beat.

Two. 

_Three._

“ _I never told you_ ” She chuckles, “ _Or anyone, but… I don’t know how to swim_ ” she confesses, “ _I only hope the lake isn’t too deep when I go down there with Pietro and Clint in the summer_ ”

She rolls onto her back and stares at the ceiling. Maybe Vision was busy, maybe he was just out of reach. Maybe she let too much time pass, it had been almost two months after all, so she promises not to talk to him again.

 

* * *

 

She does.

 

* * *

 

Clint takes them to town after two weeks away in the farm. The small town is ten minutes away, is full of people during the day Clint tells her – Not a ghost town, like Pietro joked – the people are nice and there are a lot of stores, the best part is that no one asks too many questions to them –about their accent or the fact that Pietro had grey hair – Is… Nice. It reminds her of Sokovia when they were children, but she doesn’t tells Pietro that. Clint gets the groceries, while Pietro takes Wanda to a clothing store to get a few pieces for herself, she can’t wear Clint’s old shirts forever.

Is great to see Pietro act so calm around other people, he was always outgoing but after the HYDRA experiments he became more reserved, quiet and dare she say paranoid about them getting hurt. He lets her wander around while he talks to the clerk about a horse that’s in a truck outside. She skips the flannel shirts and the heavy coats, since Clint has plenty of those.

“Pietro, I’m getting you a few things” She calls, “Something else that is not flannel shirts”

“Funny” He says, but smiles despite himself.

She notices Pietro knows quite a bit about the town even though he had left with Clint for about two months. But Pietro didn’t leave because he didn’t want to be an Avenger, he told Steve it was because he knew that it wasn’t a good idea for him and Wanda to go to missions together but Wanda knew the real reason. A few days after New Years, Pietro received a visit from Helen Cho, Wanda knew that there was something Pietro had been hiding from her, something that had been bothering him concerning his abilities. Turns out Pietro had struggled with them after he woke up, there were days when he couldn’t even run at all, Helen said that it was a secondary effect to the synthetic tissue in parts of his chest, it would take a while for his own body to fully replace them.

“Wanda” Pietro holds her hand, “Are you good?” He asks.

She looks at him and sees his eyebrows are knitted in a concern expression. Wanda nods and smiles.

“I was looking for something for you” She answers. 

“You looked like you were lost” He says as they both walk towards the counter, “Is it… Vision?”

Wanda stops walking and stares at her brother. She had never being able to hide from him, unlike he was able to hide things from her from time to time. He hugs her then, because is clear that she misses Vision, that she’s hurt. He whispers in sokovian against her hair that things will be mended in time. She nods and pulls back, she tells him that she missed him.

“I am sorry if I worried you”

“No matter, sister” He smiles softly.

“I hope you like this things” she adds, showing him the things she chose for him.

“I love them already” Pietro grins.

Wanda laughs softly and then raises and eyebrow, Pietro shrugs “I did something and Clint is going to be angry” he explains, “And I need you to be on my side, Yes?”

Wanda smiles widely with complicity, “Yes”

 

* * *

 

“No” Clint yells.

Wanda can’t help but giggle. He’s going red in the ears and Pietro is already crimson, they had been arguing for at least ten minutes since they arrived home. Wanda looks at them from the couch, Lucky is snuggled by her side and he looks unimpressed by Clint’s yelling. Much like she is, because Clint is adorable when he’s upset.

“A horse, Pietro, really?” Clint continues, “We can’t have a horse in here!”

“It is a _farm_ , Barton” Pietro retorts.

“Yeah, but we don’t have a stable” Clint says, “Not a proper one at least” he grunts.

“You said it would take about three days to fix” Pietro retorts.

Clint presses his lips and sighs heavily. Wanda knows they got to the part of the argument where none of them have anything else to say, Pietro is right about wanting to give the old horse a home since his owner is going to take him to the slaughter house anyways, but Clint also has a point, since apparently Pietro had promised to help him with reparations in the farm and the horse was going to a distraction. She considers it for a second and then speaks.

“I can take care of her” Wanda says quietly.

“What?” Both Clint and Pietro say.

“I can help with the horse” She says louder, realising that they hadn’t heard her, “While you two make… reparations”

She looks at her hands and Pietro blinks several times. Clint’s eyes soften, he hadn’t seen Wanda so quiet before. And is not that he is going to do everything she wants just because, but he really wants to make her feel comfortable, safe. That is one of the reasons he asked Pietro to fix a few things in the farm, he wanted them both to feel home since they were going to stay longer than expected.

“Is better to have her in the old stable than killing her to make glue” Clint says.

Pietro smiles, not triumphantly but looking genuinely grateful with Clint. He pulls him into a kiss that Clint accepts gladly, Wanda looks at Lucky and scratches the back of his ear, smiling to herself pleased. 

“Lucky hates horses by the way” Clint adds.

That night, Pietro cooks a Sokovian plate that Clint ends up loving. This time, Clint offers to wash the dishes while Wanda shows Pietro the things she bought and they go to bed after a few more hours. Once the house is quiet, Wanda tries again to reach Vision.

“ _We went to get clothes today and I got several dresses_ ” She starts, “ _And I got Pietro some shirts that aren’t flannels because Clint has too many, I didn’t get Clint any because I know he wouldn’t use them_ ” she chuckles.

Like before, she waits for Vision to answer. Or at least to tell her not to contact him again, she doesn't know what could be worse.

“ _We are getting a horse_ ” She smiles sadly, “ _I miss Opal, but Lucky is good, he sleeps with me every night and keeps me company when Clint and Pietro are outside repairing the house…_ ” Wanda closes her eyes tightly, “ _Or when I feel lonely_ ”

“ _How is Opal?_ ” She asks, “ _I miss her a lot_ ” She repeats.

She blinks her tears away and then takes a deep breath. Biting her lip she wipes her cheeks.

“ _And I miss you, Vis_ ”

 

* * *

 

Vision not answering was worse.

 

* * *

 

It takes the three of them two days to make the reparations necessary in the stables, Clint looks relaxed and happy while he does it, explaining Pietro and her how to do everything, maybe in another life Clint was a carpenter or someone who repairs houses for a living. She often leaves them, with the excuse that she’s walking Lucky, so they can be alone.

Wanda wants to ask where does Clint gets the money to buy the things they use, the clothes they wear and the food they eat (She secretly kept a small notebook when she wrote down the things Clint paid for and she planned on paying back).

Despite the fact that she knows that they are not a bother for Clint, she would feel better if she knew she was helping more. So when Clint takes them to town again to get more supplies – and the horse – And sees a “Help wanted” sign in a store Wanda knows what she could do. 

It’s an antique store, so well decorated and packed with old trinkets that she feels like she traveled back in time. There are several clocks, mirrors and music boxes around, Clint had given them some money so she picked one, she is about to touch the ring bell when [a scruffy looking man](http://spinoff.comicbookresources.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/following-ashmore4.jpg) appears behind the counter, he hits his head with the corner of the counter and winces.

“Shit” He says, he sees her, “Fuck, sorry- I mean-”

Wanda tries hard not to laugh.

“Sorry” The man says, “What can I do for you today”

“Um- I was taking this” She says, sliding the music box towards him. 

The man nods and grabs the box. He throws a glance at Wanda before he examines it, he explains that he has to make sure it works properly before selling it, if that wasn’t the case he could repair it and she would have to come back for it. He pulls out a thick magnifying glass.

“I saw you needed help too” Wanda says after a few minutes in silence.

The man frowns, his eyes still on the box, “What?” She shows him the sign, she had ripped it off the glass door when she entered, “Oh, that, yeah”

“I was wondering if I could get the job” She says, “I… moved in recently and I was looking for a job”

“Are you sure?” He asks, Wanda frowns, “I mean, is pretty boring, mostly just dusting off the clocks and organising a little bit” Wanda blinks, “Well, a lot, the place’s a mess” he mumbles.

“I think I can handle that” She raises an eyebrow.

The man takes the glasses off and sighs, “I might need you to lift a few boxes too”

Wanda nods fervently, “yes, yes, sure”’

“And you have to come early”

“I will do that too” She nods.

The man raises an eyebrow and then smiles softly, “When can you start?” 

“Tomorrow is good?”

He nods, “At eight”

Wanda smiles widely and the man smiles at her, packing the music box for her.

“I’m Bobby” He says offering his hand. 

Wanda accepts his hand shaking it softly, “Wanda”

He smiles and nods, giving her the bag with the music box. She is about to give him the money but he shake his head softly, telling her is welcome gift.

Pietro tells her she didn’t have to get a job, Clint smiles and tells her that if that’s what she wants she can do it, as long as she can make time to take care of the horse. Wanda names her Ruby, and yes, Lucky is terrified of her, almost as much as Ruby is of him.

“ _I have a Ruby now_ ” She says, “ _But I miss my Opal_ ” She chuckles, “ _I have a job too, Clint looked concerned about it first, like Pietro, but he says I should find something to do since staying in the farm all day is boring_ ”

“ _Pietro can take care of Ruby while I’m working, when I get home I have to take care of her though_ ”

Wanda sighs feeling frustrated, trying harder to find something that tells her that Vision is listening to her, she sniffs and hugs herself tightly.

“ _I can’t just pretend I don’t miss you, Vis_ ” She confesses, “ _I can’t act like I don’t care you are not here… I love you_ ”

She goes to sleep after that and doesn’t promise herself she won’t try again.

 

* * *

 

She likes Bobby.

The man is quiet most of the times, specially while he works on repairing the antiques. Locals don’t enter the store often, but tourists and travellers passing by always do. Bobby tells her that the store is owned by one of the richest man in town but he never visits it so he practically owns it, she asks about his parents, if he has any more family living in town.

He shakes his head, “It’s just me” he says.

“That was rude of me” She says, “I shouldn’t have-“

“Don’t worry about that” He shakes his head, “Is fine”

Wanda nods.

“What about you?” He asks.

“My brother” She answers. 

Bobby nods and continues his job.

“Where are you from?” He asks a few seconds later, “You have a nice accent”

Wanda chuckles, wiping the mirror in her hands carefully, “I’m from Sokovia”

It slips, mostly, but she doesn’t panic. For some reason she feels at ease around Bobby, the man even had a few words with Clint a few days before, when Pietro and Clint dropped by the store. She looks up and finds his blue eyes staring at her, there is a frown and he looks at her apologetically.

“It’s alright” Wanda says, “We were away when it happened”

She likes Bobby a lot, even though the man seems like he’s not telling her something, so Wanda tries to get inside his head and she’s surprise to realise that _she can’t_.

 

* * *

 

Wanda keeps calling for Vision every night.

 

He never answers.

 

* * *

 

It doesn’t scare her. Instead she finds herself being curious about it, about Bobby. She spends more time with him, asking him more questions about his life, and he answers, not really bothered by it which surprises her even more, unlike when she deflected questions he asked back, or when he said something… Nice to her. That started about two weeks after she started working in the store, Bobby would tell she was doing a good job or that she should keep doing whatever she was doing her way. He then said something about her laugh, at that she blushed without knowing why.

“Ruby is starting to run now” Wanda tells him, they are untangling lights to hang outside of the store, “Clint says that in a few weeks I could ride her”

“You mention Clint” Bobby says, “I thought your brother’s name was Pietro”

Wanda chuckles, “Yes, Clint is… He and my brother…” She trails off

“Oh” He nods, Wanda raises an eyebrow, “That’s nice” he smiles, “Having someone… it must be nice”

There is sadness in his tone and Wanda wants to ask about that. If only she could look inside his head, if only she could ask without making him sadder.

Bobby smiles all of sudden, like he remembered something, “Horses terrify me” He chuckles softly, still struggling with the lights.

Wanda’s eyes go wide, “Why? They are amazing!”

“I fell off one once and that was it for me” He says.

“Ruby wouldn’t throw you down”

Bobby chuckles, “Is that an invitation?” He asks.

Wanda looks at him, she didn’t realise how that sounded. And it indeed sounded like he was inviting him to the farm, she feels her cheeks burning for some reason and Bobby goes back to the lights.

“I’m messing with you, Wanda” He says, smiling to himself.

She nods and grabs another box, inside there are a few light bulbs that she is suppose to replace for the whole string work. Wanda throws a glance at Bobby while she replaces the last light bulb, his eyes focused on the lights, his dirty blonde hair and his light stubble, and realises why she is blushing. Bobby is a very handsome man, despite always having a stubble and dressing shabbily, and obviously likes her. He stands and goes behind the counter, plugging the lights.

“You could” She says quietly.

He turns and frowns, “What?”

Wanda straightens, “You could come to the farm one day” She says looking up at him from the floor, she is thankful the colour lights won’t let him notice her blushed cheeks.

He smiles. She isn’t sure if it’s because the lights work or because she just invited him out until he nods.

“I would like that, Wanda” He finally says.

Wanda finds herself unable to not smile, a wide smiles that reaches her eyes. Well, she would realise later, that’s the first in a while.

 

* * *

 

Wanda goes to bed early that night.

 

Even though she doesn’t call Vision, she dreams of him.

 

* * *

 

She keeps a list of novels she wants Vision to read.

 

Vision still doesn’t answer.

 

* * *

 

July was around the corner and just like Clint promised, she is able to ride Ruby finally. He goes to town a saturday early in the morning, Pietro and her stay at home – Pietro cleans the barn while Wanda cleans the house – Clint returns a few hours later with a saddle as a surprise.

“You’re acting like a five year old, Wanda” Pietro chuckled, when Wanda hugs Clint tightly.

Clint smiles, “Look who’s talking”

Pietro rolls his eyes when Wanda sticks out her tongue to him.

“Ruby is an old girl but she got a few miles on her” Clint kisses the top of Wanda’s head.

The next day at the shop, Ruby and Clint’s surprise is all Wanda can talk about. Bobby only smiles and nods while she tells him about her first ride and about Pietro falling into a mud pit. They are dusting off a box of old records Bobby received that morning, Wanda had a few she was going to buy already, maybe even sent a Frank Sinatra original to Steve once they figured out where he was, or even better, once they got together again. She goes quiet thinking about that, feeling bad that she hadn’t asked Clint about them in days.

“Something wrong?” He asks, walking towards her, he takes the vinyl off her hands, “Sinatra, huh”

Bobby walks towards the counter where there is a record player next to the cashier, and put the record on. Wanda listens to [the first song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bef_s1Bhn7o) and her eyes go sad, she knows because of the way Bobby stares at her, big ocean blue eyes looking into her green ones apologetically, he is about to turn the music off when she shakes her head.

“It reminds me of someone” She says.

Bobby nods, “Someone who... died?”

Wanda shakes her head softly, “No” She whispers, “But something really bad happened and… They are away”

“That’s… I’m sorry” Bobby swallows.

"It was..." She trails off. 

Wanda leans against the counter, watching the record spin, and she doesn’t realise Bobby moves closer until he speaks quietly and she can hear him.

"You don't have to tell me about it" He says, barely above a whisper, "But.."

Wanda's lower lip trembles, her eyesight gets cloudy with tears.

“The worst part of people leaving is not the pain, I know that" He chuckles sadly, "It's the loneliness of it, Wanda, memories need to be shared” 

She looks up at Bobby, who is looking at her with concern, his fingers ghost over her hand before he holds it and Wanda accepts the touch, intertwining her fingers with his’. She realises that Bobby isn’t just talking about her, he’s talking about himself too. That makes her feel sadder, because she still has Clint and Pietro, Steve still has Sam. Bobby is all alone.

“Do you get lonely?” Wanda asks.

Bobby looks at her eyes, considering for a few seconds, “Not anymore”

 

* * *

 

She arrives home and makes dinner for Clint and Pietro. Wanda asks Clint if she could send something to Steve and Clint nods, telling her that the blond contacted them and left an address they could write letters to each other.

“And no, Pietro, you can’t send stinky bombs to Sam” Wanda says.

“That was Clint’s idea!” Pietro groans.

That night while laying in her bed, she tells Vision about it. She promises to write him too, and then she tells him that she wouldn’t need to if he answered her. She asks him about Tony, like she did lately, the man must be thinking that she dislikes him but she doesn’t, in fact she cares deeply for him, she makes sure to repeat that.

" _Steve misses him too, I know it_ " Wanda says, " _Please, Vision, don't let Tony forget that_ "

Again, there is nothing but silence. So she cries, tired of the feeling of weariness in her heart, the heavy of her chest.

" _Goddammit, Vision_ " Wanda sobs, " _Don't- Don't let me give up on you_ " She takes a deep breath in, " _Don't make me_ " 

 

* * *

 

After that day, she notices Bobby starts talking more to her about his life. He used to live in Long Island with his family, Wanda assumes he comes from money since he tells her about his big house and the stables with horses, he tells her about his brother but never speaks of his parents. Wanda tells him about Sokovia when she was little, her brother and her parents, she likes talking about them but Pietro doesn't like talking about them much, it makes him sad and she doesn't want that.

She also tells Bobby that her and Pietro moved to the States looking for a better life, she avoids talking about the Avengers, of course, about them living in the tower and the Avengers compound. 

"I like New York during winter better" Wanda tells him, they are putting an old clock together.

"Why?" He asks, "Is too cold"

She smiles, "I like the cold" Wanda chuckles, "I like ice skating, I though I could go skating once the lake near the farm froze" Bobby chuckles, "I have to wait for winter again to dust off my skates"

Bobby looks at her and nods.

"Yeah" He says, "I guess"

 

* * *

 

Pietro and Clint end up liking Bobby too. Ruby doesn’t though and after Pietro tells him to not take it personally – Because he can’t get near her either – Bobby decides not to ride horses after all. Wanda shows him the farm, is almost August but the lake is completely unfrozen, the weather is cool but she can wear her summer dresses and walk around with just a cardigan without getting too chilly.

“Sokovia was colder” She tells Bobby when he offers her his jacket, “All year long”

She shows him the stables, where they feed Ruby while she tells him about a novel he had given her. The Great Gatsby, Bobby told her once he had never been an avid reader, so she reads books and then tells him about them, like a bedtime story. Bobby told her he liked listening to her tell the stories, because of her accent in part but mostly because of the way her eyes lit up as she did so.

Bobby waits until she finishes to say, “I wanted to tell you something”

Wanda nods and wipes the front of her dress from the hay. Bobby - Who she realised had shaved and was wearing a clean shirt - looks around to make sure no one is listening and then takes her hand, dragging her outside, walking towards a small pond where Ruby sometimes drink water from. He had a bag, and he gives it to Wanda before he starts talking.

“The reason I live here is because my family… they were scare of me” He says, Wanda frowns when she pulls out a pair of skates from the bag, “They kicked me out when they found out I could do these things”

Wanda frowns, "What do you mean?" 

Bobby licks his lips and offers her his hand. His hand is shaking, like he’s nervous about something, maybe about Wanda turning her back on him. She takes his hand and takes a step forward, clutching the skates in her hands. Bobby lets go and sinks the tips of his fingers in the water, Wanda doesn’t know if to run but when she sees what happened she gasps. The pond freezes in a matter of seconds despite the weather.

“Bobby- How did you- I mean- “ Wanda stammers.

She knows the answer, he’s an enhanced just like her. That’s why he wasn’t able to read his mind so easily. She gives a step back, until she’s completely out his reach and she can feel her power running through body, wanting to drip off her fingers. He looks hurt and Wanda realises is because she looks scared of him.

"I'm not going to hurt you, Wanda" He says quietly. 

Wanda knew what it was to be something people feared, to be capable of things that others didn't understand. She thinks about telling Bobby that, but that would mean having to tell him a lot more, so she keeps to herself.

“I’m sorry” Wanda says, “Is… It surprised me” She lies.

Bobby looks at her and she offers him an honest smile.

"Do you... Do you want to skate?" He asks.

Wanda grins widely, nodding fervently. She is glad she found someone like her, even if he doesn't know it yet. She puts the skates on and moves around the small pond for a few minutes, Bobby doesn't know how to skate so he walks carefully over the ice while he explains her that there are more people like him. 

_I_ _nhumans._

Bobby stays quiet after that, searching for something in Wanda's eyes and when he doesn't he says, “I’m sorry I lied to you” he says, “I’ve been meaning to tell you for a while now”

Wanda looks at him and he starts walking away, he loses his balance and falls on the ice. She snorts and laughs, Bobby laughs too and she skates towards him. Bobby looks up at her as she takes her cardigan off and lays it on the ice so she can sit next to Bobby. They both stare at the skies for a few seconds in silence.

“Technically..." Wanda says quietly, "hiding something is not lying”

Bobby looks at her and she smiles widely, he then laughs softly and Wanda follows. She takes his hand and they stay in a comfortable silence for a while, she rests her head on his shoulder and smiles when she’s able to get inside his head.

She sees the store first. Then herself and Bobby dusting off old clocks inside. the small town at night, when is quiet and you can see all the stars. And realises that just like her, those are the things that make Bobby happy.

 

* * *

 

“Checkmate!” Peter grins triumphantly, throwing a fist to the air.

Vision chuckles softly and raises a hand in surrender, petting Opal's black fur with the other one. Peter Parker was a brillant kid, but not smart enough to beat him in chess, so the fact that he won this time without Vision letting him is definitely impressive. He looks at the clock and realises is almost ten.

“Shouldn’t you be in bed now?” Vision says, standing up, Opal jumps from the couch and sits next to Peter.

Peter groans, “Fine” he says, “I have to skype May anyways” he says, "But first remind her what is skype"

Vision chuckles, “You better be going them”

Peter nods, “I want a rematch tomorrow!” he says as he enters the elevator.

He is always reminded how emtpy the commpound is once the kid goes to his room. It had been Tony’s idea to get him a room while he pretended to be a “scholarship kid” – he was actually working with him in some secret projects that had to do with Spiderman – like that people wouldn’t suspect anything. Only him and Tony knew about his secret identity. 

Thor hadn’t visited either, but he send his regards and told them he was going to be in Asgard for a while with Jane Foster. Tony spent most of his time working, in meetings or searching for Bruce, so it was nice to have Peter to spend time with. He goes to his room and takes another book from the pile that Pepper had sent the day before, Opal cuddles on his side as he starts reading. He is in the middle of the book when he hears her voice.

Again.

Is torture listening to Wanda's voice as if she’s in the room with him knowing she’s miles away, in some place he probably hadn’t heard about. It started a few days after he found out the Avengers had escaped the raft, Wanda trying to reach him. He thought about answering her, but that would make things harder. Things such as standing in a room with the secretary of state and lie about now knowing their whereabouts.

Hearing her every night was torture, and denying himself Wanda, was the punishment he deserved for failing her in the first place.

“ _Lucky ate my copy of The Great Gatsby_ ” She says, “ _But I had already finished it so… I told Bobby about it and he didn’t like it because of Jay dying at the end_ ”

He had heard her talking about Bobby for over a month now and he can’t help to feel a pinch of jealousy in his chest. But Vision is smart, he knows that Wanda can be happy wherever she is now, with whoever she is with now, even if she isn’t _with_ him yet. Is not because he doesn’t love her, or because he thinks she doesn’t love him.

He loves her so much.

That’s why Vision continues reading that night as if nothing had happened. As if Wanda wasn’t reaching to him, as if Wanda was not there anymore. Because she isn’t.

So he cuts her off.

Late that night Vision lays on his back with eyes closed , a [melody](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bef_s1Bhn7o) stuck in his head, trying to shake the feeling of restlessness off his weary heart. And for the thousandth time he tells himself once again.

“If she loved me, she will be able to love someone else one day”

 

 

 

_“And I will swallow my pride, You're the one that I love and I'm saying goodbye... Say something, I'm giving up on you”_


End file.
